I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
