i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
