In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize