Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
