Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
