wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
