My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize
