This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Ambien. No doubt about it.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
