Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize