My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
