Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
