Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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