he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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