Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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