let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
