I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
