Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
