return my video game
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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