Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Randomize