I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
