Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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