she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
