You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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