Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
