3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
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