Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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