You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize
