I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
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