Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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