I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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