Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
A+ Viking dick
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Randomize
