A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
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