HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
