Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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