someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
