Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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