so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
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