She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
