First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize