so that wasnt chicken after all
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Randomize
