how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
