You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
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