so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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