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• (408): View more from California

  My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable

  (818): View more from California

  Freshman in high school? Just your type

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.

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• (928): View more from Arizona

  I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover

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• (763): View more from Minnesota

  So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.

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• (407): View more from Florida

  She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.

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• (707): View more from California

  My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?

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• (563): View more from Iowa

  Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?

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