brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Randomize
