# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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