I want to walk on stilts...naked
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
She needs sedatives and a leash
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
