Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
