Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
My liver just had a heart attack.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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