he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize