and you said cock pushups were impossible
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
